Life After College --

I was told (by myself) that I should write something light about what life is (or has become) after college...

Well... to me, it hasn't been too dandy.

It's been 6 LONG months now since I graduated from college. I am now an accountant working at a bank, the youngest, least experienced person in my department. Doesn't that sound awful? It's intimidating being the least experienced, least knowledgeable, dumbest person... and the list of let-downs goes on... in your group.

I used to be the best in the group. I used to be the person with the highest score, with the most ideas, with the most enthusiasm in any group. Most of the time. Or at least I was told.

I'm not an uber smart person; I had to work hard to get to where I am now. Back in college, I was a friggin genius compared to my peers. Or at least I was told.

Being a very conscientious person and being overprotected by my parents, I didn't party at all. I did not go out, did not break rules, focused on studies, had a routine, was fairly organized, did not stress as much as procrastinators did. I had a thing going on in my life as far as I could remember. And then senior-itis kicked in.

I did not break during my senior year. I had a boyfriend, an internship, and an upcoming graduation. It all fell apart shortly after I graduated. My first heartbreak (as readers could possibly tell from my entries way back), my consecutive failures, my unmotivated-ness.

I take it. It's harder to be out of college and let go when school was your life! I get that now.

I got a job, and then let go of that to go to another one. I was happier with the latest one. I am grateful to have gotten it because I've always wanted to be in a bigger company. Small companies don't work for me. I like being a nobody--to a point.

And so my boredom began and my being unmotivated got the best of me. I couldn't focus, but I took the first part of the CPA anyway, just to see if I could do it. And, lo and behold! Of course I can't. At least I tried, though.

Recently, I joined the theatre again. I performed again. It was awesome. I love being around the arts during my down days. It makes me happy.

So that's what I do now. I go out, I have fun. I try to compensate for all the times that I did not have fun in college. See, this is why balance is important. I'm just sorry that I wasn't able to have that balance (nor was I interested in it) in college. I've been a late bloomer all my life. So here I am-- just trying to loosen up.

Like I said, you don't realize these things until you ALMOST die. Twice. In one week.

Love to the nth,

Maria

***By the way, some people have made school their lives, but have been very successful after college. Like I said, I'm not that smart (just smarter than some people sometimes), and I don't have the drive to do what I want to do yet. I'll get there eventually, but right now all I can say is that life is short, and though I don't want it to be shorter, I'm not gonna just let it pass by either. 

Searching for the right... Makeup

Oh heck yeah!

Well, before I start talking about makeup-- let me just point out that it is 5:45 am right now on a TUESDAY. I haven't slept so early or woken up so early in MONTHS! Oh my gosh, I love it!

It's been hard for me to wake up in the morning knowing that I would be bored the whole day, but it's time to make the most of my days and have fun. I keep reminding myself that I almost died twice in a week. TWICE! What person can survive two almost-deaths in a week??

LOL, of course a lot. Actually, every person is lucky enough to be alive the next day. Anything can happen. This is me being optimistic. 

Anyway, makeup. First of all, I'm a noob for anything cosmetic OR anything fashion. My clothes are prettier if someone else wears it kinda thing. I used to not give __ about how I look. I still don't, but at least now I try. 

Anywho, I have no idea where this topic is going, but all I know is that I'm looking for good makeup, particularly eyeshadows/eyeliners that won't crease. I might just get an eyeshadow primer--or experiment with alternatives such as concealer on my eyelids just so the shadow itself won't smudge. I've had enough smudging in my life, it's so unattractive.

----- That's about it for that topic ---- Moving on to the next one ----- HA! Sorry, I only have so much to talk about when it comes to aesthetics -----

Love to the nth,

M.

A Heart in the Ground Full of Whales

"...And I hope that all that dirt from Catherine's grave gets caught in your throat and you both choke to death on it!"

Okay, gruesome--but probably the best line I've ever said in a play so far. Or close enough.

But! The one-act plays are over. I had fun with all of the plays I was in. I got to bond with my theatre friends more-- and I got to work with the people I've worked with in the past. I just love AUT --it has always been good to me and it has taught me a lot!

Heart in the Ground - I fell in love with this play from the very monologue that I read during auditions. I found myself in the same situation as Karen (my character) at the time. I was stressed, I was confused and distraught, but, at the same time, I had someone who made me strong, and I was on the verge of losing it all too easily.

Since Jeff cut my thank-you note for the program, I would like to thank him here. Thank you, Jeff L. Schaefer for sharing this opportunity with me. Thanks for being so awesome and creative--and for not giving up on the script. I had so much fun, it made me sad that it all had to end.

"It rained so much that everything was just soaked through with water. Seemed like we were in the mud with everything else. Just heavy and wet." -Karen, Heart in the Ground

(Picture taken by me, 2008)

Whales - This play, I did not expect to get. It had an interesting plot. It was long and had so much to it that one had to listen closely to what the characters said.
I had the rare opportunity to play Grace--a cop/sheriff/ranger who grew up with three other people in a place called Hatteras. I didn't get to know Grace enough to know who she really was and what her character was supposed to be, but I made it a point to make her the fun one.

To Tori Gooden, thank you for trusting me with Grace's character. It was a privilege to have been able to work with you during this rare opportunity. You are awesome and should stay that way.

AU spring production Adam and Eve (Spring 2009). Look, it's the fish we used in Whales. :)

Jenny Does Shakespeare - Okay, now this was interesting. I was the announcer/moderator. I did not show myself on stage at all for this (except for curtain call), but I liked it and it was a great experience nonetheless. Again a rare opportunity.

Josh (Jushua) Dye, thanks for texting me that VERY long text, asking me if I was available for it. It truly made me happy :)

Although the week of the plays was just horrendously stressful for me, I survived it and I am grateful that I did. I learned to appreciate life more and loosen up. Yeah I had several failures, but I saw what's important--and that is the support that I have: my family and friends.

I'd forgotten how much I enjoyed theatre as well as the reasons I tried to stay away from it for a while. Now I remember. But will those reasons ever be enough to make me stop loving it? I don't think so.

'Til we meet again--


Love to the nth,

Maria Morales Lusica