Being able to express one's feelings without exposing every bit of it is a hard task. Realizing the ups and downs of this 'weirdness', I began to succumb to it. I mean, it isn't that of a big deal anyway.
Many years have passed since I had my eyes set on that 'person'. I've done the first task of being somewhat involved with that person, and no -- not that kind of involvement. I became that person's 'person'. I became a best friend. I became involved somehow in a small percentage in that person's life. I rode that coaster for many years hoping that I could become the special person that person dreams of being with. Sadly, not everything worked hard for can be obtained. I became used to being a best friend, and now, I think it is much better being the best friend than being the special person. Who else could one open up to when the special person is not there -- or the special person is the reason of the dilemma? -- ten ten!! the best friend.
Of course I have no regrets. I give the best advices that I could come up with. Advices that could benefit for the betterment and happiness of all parties involved. There were days that I pushed myself to being that person's person even though there is a person designated to that person already. Things change drastically over time. I got the position, and you could say that I did it for myself. I fed my selfishness, but now, I paid my debt to my conscience and set aside my own selfishness for the happiness of others. As for my desire-- well, I believe in destiny...
--nothing follows---
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